When planning your wedding, do you rely on your friends recommendations, a google search, local magazines, or maybe bridal shows to find the best vendors? How can you be really sure that you are getting the best of the best, while still getting a good price for your area? It's become more and more popular for photographers and other local vendors to participate in "styled shoots", that is, a fake wedding that pulls together the best local wedding vendors to show off their services in as "real" of a setting you can get!

Styled shoots are great for you to look out for and pay attention to because it literally shows you a "trial run" of all the best, hand selected vendors in your area. Who better to pick a team of super services that those that are in constant community with each other in the wedding industry? As wedding professionals, we have worked with nearly every local vendor there is and can recommend the best to you through our styled shoots - because we picked them ourselves! For the guys reading this - think of it like your fantasy football draft of all the best wedding vendors in town, and they are facing off to show you their stuff!

The idea is that local vendors all come together in collaboration, donating time and services, to show you, the bride to be, the best of what they can do or offer. It's better than a recommendation, search engine session, perusing a magazine, or waltzing around a bridal show because you can see exactly what your wedding would be like if you were to hire them.

My great friend Jackie and I have been planning this styled shoot for months! We were over-the-moon excited when vendors one by one gave enthusiastic "yes!"s to help us pull off an unforgettable day! Be sure to check out the local vendors, hand selected by us for their excellent services, for your wedding, and be sure to like them on facebook and give them a follow on Instagram!

Photographers: J.Jae Photography + Jill Gearhart Photography

Venue: The Barn at Rayne Run

Rental Furniture: Penn Rustics

Gown: White Lace Bridal featuring Stella York

Shoes: Jewel by Badgley Mischka

Tuxedo: The 700 Shop  featuring Stephen Geoffrey

Jewelry: Luxenberg's Jewlers

Florals: The Flower Gallery

Calligraphy/Invitation Suite: Victoria Fiaretti

Hair: JC Penney

Models: Adam + Tara Maruca

Evergreen Swing / Assistant: Ryan Anderson

When thinking about these 5 things for your wedding, is it really important to have great communication with your photographer. Covering the topics below together help us be prepared with the right gear (and literally be in the right place) to make sure every little detail and moment that is important to you is captured to the best of our ability.

Each region of the country (and world!) has different wedding traditions, and while your photographer is prepared for the "normal" wedding day, you can generally assume that anything that makes this wedding unique to you is something that you need to tell your photographer. Is your dress your moms? Wearing grandmas ring? Do you have a crazy Aunt Betty who is a photo nut and will be at your photographers hip each moment? Grooms, are you planning a surprise fireworks show? Are you pulling a rubber chicken out of your bride's dress when you go all "Mission Impossible" under there for the garter? Do you have super cool food options like a food truck instead of the stuffed chicken a la buffet? Tell me! Part of the fun of planning weddings now is that literally anything goes. And I want to be ready to rock it so you can always remember it!

Here are 5 big areas you should cover when you sit down to meet your photographer:

Family Photos

If it's important to you (or your mom, dad, stepmom - whoever!) to get a photo with a specific combination of family members, you MUST give your photographer a list, especially when blended families are involved. There's nothing worse that leaving someone out or hurting someone's feelings over wedding pictures. Sit down with your fiancé and your family AND his or her family and ask about any family photos they need to have. If the list gets out of hand, just pare it down. You and your fiancé are the boss! It's YOUR wedding! Your photographer will absolutely do everything they can as time allows to get all of the shots, but he or she has to know what shots to get in the first place. And trust me, don't wait until the day of the wedding to just shout out combinations of aunts and uncles. You will be distracted and pulled in a million different directions, not to mention timelines can be tight to fit in portraits and travel to the reception. Don't let that stress you out - let me handle it! 

Time Line

Speaking of the time, it's essential you tell your photographer the timeline of your wedding. If you are doing a first look, getting ready in a different location other than the church, or if there is a good amount of travel time from location to location, these are all things that your photographer will be grateful to know ahead of time! If the logistics and scheduling of everything is giving you a headache, let your photographer and DJ help. We have been to hundreds of weddings and can tell you how much time things take, including those sneaky time-suckers like receiving lines that you may not have thought about. Just as important, if a time or location changes, even day of, your photographer should be in the know about that too. We are constantly keeping track of the time (I have a watch in my camera bag in case my phone dies) and trying to fit in everything you want to do while keeping a fun vibe (but on schedule!), so delegate that stress to us!

Lighting

A lot of churches frown upon using flash, so be sure to check with the little old church secretary (I can say that because I'm basically my church's secretary lol), and see what the officiant's preference on flash is. If your photographer is used to using flash everywhere, it's definitely worth bringing up. Most photographers have lenses that are up to the job no matter what the lighting is like, but just make sure they know in advance so they can pack correctly.

Also. Sparklers. Please, please PLEASE tell us when you are using sparklers, or even glow sticks (that was a rad wedding!) for an exit. If there's fire or other low-light fun things happening, we've gotta know so we can be in place with the right gear. It's helpful, too, if you can take your time walking through all the beautiful sparks instead of sprinting the heck outta there! Your honeymoon can wait 30 more seconds, I promise ;)

Special Details

One of the things that make weddings so dear and personal are details. It's really a great way to infuse your personality, family, history, and anything significant to you into your wedding. My rule of thumb when photographing weddings is that if you made it or paid for it, I'm going to photograph it! But if there is something very important to you that may not be on display or obvious, make sure to let us know so we can snap a pic!

Phipps Conservatory Wedding Pittsburgh PA

Surprises

I love it when grooms and brides surprise each other with things during their wedding. Be it a gift or prayer before the ceremony, a note, a fireworks show, a game during the reception, a choreographed dance, whatever, let us in on the secret! We promise we won't tell, and you can be sure that we will be in the right place at the right time!

It's my goal to teach you that your photographer is so much more than a lady or dude snapping photos on your wedding day. Something that is so intrinsic to my personality and my only really true passion is service, and it's essential to being a good photographer. Your photographer should be there to calm you down, keep you on track, encourage you, direct you, create with you, laugh with you, and take care of you. The more information you can give us, the better we can serve you - and that's what it's all about!

Are you considering having your wedding on or around a holiday? As if weddings aren't overwhelming enough, let's throw the craziness and busyness of the holidays into the mix! But, there can be some great benefits to hosting your friends and family around such iconic times. Whether it's New Year's Eve like Casey and Jon, or a Labor Day wedding, Halloween wedding, Valentine's Wedding - whatever - there are lots of great reasons to take on the added logistics of a holiday wedding. 

FAMILY

One of the obvious benefits of a holiday wedding is that it's likely that family will be in town. If having those that you love close for your wedding is important to you, this is a big win. I've photographed a lot of weddings around Labor Day or Memorial Day, which is really smart in my opinion because most people have off the following Monday - which means an extra day to recover from all the shenanigans! Be sure to book flights and blocks of hotel rooms well in advance, however, because a lot of people will be traveling and staying during these times of the year.

Traditions

As you grow old and gray together, think of how special your anniversary will be enveloped in the special traditions you normally do around the holiday. While still enjoying all of your normal traditions, it will be that much sweeter to mix celebrating your love in with it!  It's likely that family will be close by for the holidays anyway, and how special will it be to reminisce with everyone about how magical your wedding day was?! Plus, the big perk - your husband probably won't forget your anniversary!

decor

A really fun part of a holiday wedding is the decorations! If you are unsure how or what to decorate with, most holidays come with "usual", iconic things that people can immediately identify with. This also allows you to have some fun and go a bit non-traditional from the normal flowers and candles, incorporating anything that is special to you from pumpkins to pine cones. You can even extend this idea into the type of dress you and your guests wear!

take it from the bride

What does Casey, the lovely bride featured here, have to say about having a NYE wedding?

"Do it!! It’s a really crazy time of year and I remember saying to myself on Christmas Eve, “who said it was a good idea to get married the week after Christmas?” But in all honesty, if I could do it all over again, I’d pick New Year’s Eve every time. Jon and I picked that day for a couple of reasons, first of all we never have anything fun to do on NYE so it seemed fitting that we would just throw the party this year. The second reason is that NYE is the first time Jon realized I existed when he saw a picture of me on Facebook that his cousin (and my best friend Rachel) posted of us, so again, it all seemed fitting.

For us, the actual wedding was all about getting family and friends together to celebrate and getting married on a holiday is the absolute perfect time to do it! I don’t think it even matters what holiday it is, just the fact that you were all going to get together anyways but now it makes it extra special!

As far as advice to those brides who want to get married on or around a holiday: have fun with it! You picked that holiday on purpose, so party it up! We incorporated NYE with putting out hats and noise makers our around 10:30pm that way they weren’t in all the wedding pictures but we wanted it to be a wedding/NYE party. I think it took the stress away from “the perfect wedding” knowing that it was also a party to bring in the new year. When I did start to get a little stressed, I just kept telling myself, it’s just a New Year’s party and I already have my outfit picked out so I’m ahead of the game! "

"The biggest thing to remember is the wedding is just about celebrating the day

and the marriage is about celebrating for a lifetime."

Do you wish you could do more with your wedding dress other than stuff it in a closet for another day and another lifetime? You spend hundreds if not thousands of dollars on your wedding gown, and hopefully that cash means you feel like a million bucks on your big day, so why should the fate of your gown be a dark and lonely one in a garment bag in the back of your closet? It's becoming more and more popular for couple to schedule anniversary sessions where the gown gets to come out of retirement, and a bride gets to feel just as special as she did on her favorite day.

A few of my friends have done this, and if I still had my gown I totally would (more on that HERE), so when Kelly approached me about doing an anniversary session (I was a bridesmaid for her wedding), I was SUPER excited. We had such fun planning a mini wedding day, Kelly calling on some of the best local vendors in the industry to get her ready for her re-debut as a bride! Her gorgeous, soft up-do was done by Hannah at Cameron's Salon, the stunning makeup was courtesy of BethyMae, and of course, a girl's gotta accessorize! Kelly got a custom necklace made by Rosie at Miss Pie Jewelry!

Kelly and I have been close friends for quite some time, and there's not much she loves more than catching up with friends over a cup of coffee from the Commonplace (except shopping, of course. And LuLaRoe). Luckily her hubby also likes coffee, so it was natural that she and Jamison started off the anniversary session with a waltz into this super cool coffeehouse to share a cup in their Mr. and Mrs. mugs!

We intended to cut into their cake from yester-year, but none of us realized that it was akin to a delicious frosted glacier and would take several days to thaw out. There's your pro-tip: a week before your anniversary, set a reminder on your phone to move your cake from the freezer to the fridge. After the frozen cake and the hot coffee (and a few shocked stares from college students cramming for finals), we headed to Pittsburgh to get some magical photos in front of the Christmas tree at PPG Place.

As you can imagine, we got some crazy looks as we ran around both Indiana and Pittsburgh in the 17 degree weather in full wedding regalia, but I think you'll agree the end results are worth it! My awesome friend Jackie from J.jae Photography let me try out her super cool Mag Mod flash modifier, and when you throw in the gentle snowfall with this dreamy backlight, well, you just gotta see for yourself!

This time of year, lots of people are getting family photos taken with screaming kids, maybe grandparents, or even a fluffy pooch in tow and it may be tempting to call in the troops to help you manage it all - here I'm sharing tips for those who are asked to be a part of the fun and assist during a photo shoot! Over the summer when senior sessions are in full swing, it's common to have your mom or dad to come along to share in the experience and make it less awkward spending a few hours with a total stranger. I have seen lots of clients even invite along friends to wrangle dogs, grandmas to soothe babies, and siblings to hang out during their family portrait sessions too. I LOVE meeting new people, and am always so grateful for an extra set of hands! So, from a photographer's point of view, if you are considering having someone come along for your senior or family shoot, here's some things to share with them!

When the Camera Goes Up, the Volume Goes Down

I spent years as a studio photographer, where it was very common for a crowd to walk in with those being photographed. It's still common now, especially during family shoots, for sisters, friends, grandmas, etc. to come along to "help make the kids smile." The best thing you can do is watch the photographer and when the camera goes up, allow him or her to be the only one communicating with the family, kids, senior, etc. Your photographer has likely had hundreds of subjects in front of their camera and has some tried and true tricks on how to get their subject to authentically smile - in fact, you can read some of those tricks here! The photographer has a certain look or emotion they are trying to coax out of the subject, and it is the most helpful to allow him or her the chance to have the model's complete attention to ensure that happens.

There's No Such Thing As Personal Space

This is more for family sessions, but if a photographer does ask you, the trusty friend or mom, to help get the subject's attention, it's best to stand directly behind him or her. I tell people to basically jump on top of me. If you are trying to coax the gaze of a three-nager directly into the camera, it's best to have the person they are looking at or watching be as close to the lens as possible. Get all up in my biz!

Be a Pack Mule

Here's for all you senior moms and dads. I get this question a lot - is it normal for a parent to come along on a senior shoot? The answer? It's perfectly normal! About 50% of my seniors come to their session with their mom or dad. And as insensitive as it sounds, it's really helpful to everyone if a parent can be a coat rack, more or less. Senior sessions are all about the clothes, am I right? Without minimizing the importance of you wonderful parents out there, it's important that the photographer can get to know the amazing son or daughter you already know so well. Teenagers can be a bit introverted around strangers, and the best thing you can do to help your teenager feel comfortable is to show your quiet support by taking care of the details like holding and organizing their outfit changes.

Let Me Teach You Something

Here's a fun tip for anyone, at any type of session: let me put you to work. I love when folks are interested in the process of the photo taking, and not just focused on getting the subjects to smile. That's my job! I love, too, when you are willing to learn something and excited to help out! Something I've found that people are thrilled to help with is holding a reflector. The photo session as a whole should be an enjoyable experience for everyone, and I've found that when willing parents and friends are teachable and become involved in creating the photo by holding a shiny silver disc, they take ownership of the end product. They too become excited to see a perfectly lit subject, and how their small effort of holding a homing beacon for ET can affect the quality so much. So many people have a closet interest in photography, and I am more than happy to teach and explain anything and everything you want to ask me!

For the senior session highlighted below, Katie chose to come to her senior session by herself. I think it's wise to know yourself and know how you are around strangers, and if being alone with your photographer will push you to talk a little more, that's probably the wisest choice. Katie and I had no problem keeping the conversation going as she taught me about her interests, her family, and her inspirations for the future! I hope you enjoy the highlights of her beautiful session below!

There's not much that's more exciting than taking a boat ride, but when you get to have your wedding ceremony on the upper deck of Pittsburgh's Gateway Clipper in the middle of the river by the Point State Park fountains, that's a recipe for the best day of your life!

Victoria and Chris had a beautiful and exciting wedding day as they their vows in the golden sunlight on the top deck of the famous paddle boat. Guests enjoyed a meal as we were  cruising up and down the Allegheny river. The dance floor was packed all night, and there were plenty of guests enjoying the stars and the breath-taking city night-scape on the decks above.

Because the ceremony and reception were all in the same location, and we couldn't exactly sneak away for photos, Chris and Victoria opted to do all family portraits and bridal party portraits before embarking on the boat ride. We hit all the famous and beautiful spots Pittsburgh has to offer, like PPG Place, Point State Park, and Mount Washington.

Victoria was easily one of the most stunning brides I ever have been blessed to photograph, and the fun, sweet-spirited chemistry she and her fiance Chris had together made photographing them, and spending hours and hours with them, effortless and so enjoyable. I hope you enjoy the highlights of their unique day, and maybe just maybe it will inspire you to take a ride on this amazing attraction, The Gateway Clipper, in one of the greatest cities in the country! (They didn't even pay me to say that. I just REALLY love boatrides!)

A note before you dive in: this is a personal post intended to show you a bit of my life and my heart. My life is more than photography, and I am passionate about sharing everything I learn that gives me joy in hopes that it can bring you joy in your life too, whether you're a photographer, a fiancee, a senior, a mom, or just a fan. If this kind of touchy-feely stuff isn't for you, hop on over to my Blog Archive to find just what you're looking for!

WHY YOU NEED MARRIAGE COUNSELING

There is so much out there to prepare us to get married. We can plan every detail of our day out down to the napkin color. We take pre-marital counseling and learn how many kids our spouse wants to have or ways to "fight nice" if you're lucky. But no one ever teaches you how to BE married after the GET married part is done. And once you are married, you understand why that is - it's a difficult, individual, and evolving process. This is year 5 of wedded bliss for my hubby and I, and while I am certainly no expert on love, and while I haven't been married all that long, I have learned some big lessons along the way that I'm all too happy to pass on.

WHY I NEEDED COUNSELING

Do you know what the word stigma means? It means there's a pre-conceived idea, or judgement, about a certain thing. The stigma with marriage counseling is that it's for couples that can't make it on their own, who's love life has crashed and is burning before their eyes. That simply isn't true. Counseling can make a good marriage great, and if your spouse wants to go to counseling, it is one of the most selfless acts of love he or she can show you. It means he's in it 100%. That she is  willing to do whatever it takes to stay strong. 

Our marriage was definitely good, but we weren't doing whatever it took to stay strong. In fact, the world weakened us more and more each year we were married. We weathered things like job loss and unemployment (both of us). Shattered dreams when the careers we prepared our lives for were met with shut doors over and over as interview after interview didn't pan out - again, for both of us. Surgeries and illness from people that depended on us for their care. The death of both of our fathers and the financial stress that put on us when we were left with a funeral to pay for. None of this is a plea for pity. It is simply to say, how amazing is the God we serve to give us exactly what we needed to strengthen us?! He gave us the strength to pick ourselves up and reinvent ourselves over and over until we landed on something great.

One afternoon, we had one of the most real, heart-wrenching conversations we ever had. Our marriage, and we both agreed on this, was weakening more and more each year. And because we believe that marriage is a covenant and that God wants us to be happy, we decided to go to counseling. Year 5 was going to be great (and it has been!)

SEEK PEACE AND PURSUE IT

I had a lot of bitterness in my heart. I'm a perfectionist, impatient, quick to get annoyed. Or at least, I was. Our counselor, after a few sessions, put the frank and honest impression on me that if we wanted things to get stronger, I had to do a major heart check. So I went to the one thing that was always right, always true, always good enough: my faith. Psalm 34:14 reads "seek peace and pursue it." It was so hard to do. When I got disproportionally annoyed at something, I had to seek peace and pursue that peace. Seek it, meaning shut my mouth and LOOK for it in my heart, in the memories we created together, in the "forever-ness" that my anchor tattoo was to remind me of. And it was hard. When you seek and FIND, you then have to pursue. That meant choosing not to react, not to let my uncontrolled emotions out. And like the true magic of scripture, heeding the Lord's advice began to transform me. I wasn't as annoyed. I was happier. It was working.

REACTION VS. RESPONSE

What I was essentially doing was teaching myself to respond, not react. It's a concept I didn't think about much until out counselor spelled it out. It applied to Brandon too - I had to allow him time to react, and ignore that reaction, and take his later response as truth. We both learned a lot of grace for each other in this season. We learned to communicate difficult things, "hot-button" issues, and allowed each other to react, to work through those raw emotions, before dealing with how we truly felt, or responded.

LEARN HOW TO FIGHT

When you're dating someone, you learn so much about them. Preference, tastes, history - but did you learn about his or her emotions and how he or she deals with them? Now that my husband and I made space for our emotions to play out in a safe way that wouldn't hold weight or inflict damage, we had to figure out what triggered the bad ones have a plan to deal with them. We had to learn how to fight.

During a fight, do you come after your partner guns-ablaze, wanting to shout down every detail? Do you want to just run away and not be bothered or even looked at? We were one of each. And it took actually talking about how we prefer to fight, and then pursuing a compromise (space at first, with a promise to talk after our emotions were in-check) to really learn how to take fights from DEstructive to CONstructive.

WHAT ISN'T YOUR LOVE LANGUAGE

One of the newer revelations I've had is that it's not only important to know what your spouse's love language is, but perhaps more importantly for YOU, what isn't. If you haven't heard of Dr. Chapman's love languages, they are 5 ways in which people typically feel loved. They are, in no particular order, Physical Touch, Acts of Service, Words of Affirmation, Gifts, and Quality Time. While Brandon and I know that Quality Time is both of our love languages (how lucky!), and we intentionally schedule coffee dates, devotionals, bible studies, and set aside one day a week just for fun plans together, it took a few years to figure out the implications of honoring what WASN'T our love language.

I would get very upset when I spent hours cleaning the house or prepping meals, only to have a "thanks so much" in return. It seemed like I just put in the effort to climb Mount Everest, and the response I got was a seemingly flippant "cool" and not the overflow of excited praise and gratitude I was expecting. Understanding what holds weight to your spouse, or in other words what their love language is,  will greatly shape how enthusiastically they respond and how deeply it will affect them. I finally chose not to be offended, but rather to understand that the gratitude is there, just not expressed as strongly as I was expecting it because he just isn't wired that way. And that's ok!

LOVE BEARS ALL THINGS

So if you are in the throws of Pinterest board building to prepare for your upcoming wedding, or if you have been married years already and find random socks all throughout your house too, I truly hope this advice can strike a chord and make your marriage great. I highly encourage counseling, which teaches us above all else, to pay attention to our emotions and talk them out. I love love. I'm in the profession of love as a wedding photographer, and there's nothing I want more than to help people remember why they love each other. One of the greatest pieces of marriage advice actually came to me just yesterday as I was reading "How's Your Soul" by Judah Smith. I'll leave you with this truth-bomb as Judah explores the 4 characteristics of love, found in 1 Cor. 13:7:

“The first term is bear.... The term literally means ‘put a roof on.’ Figuratively, it has the idea of covering or keeping something confidential; it can also mean putting up with something. Paul was telling the Corinthian believers that love is a roof and a cover. Love protects, shields, and conceals the weaknesses of others.... This doesn’t mean we ignore sin; it means we don’t use people fault’s and failures to expose or shame them. We publicly cover them and privately restore them with the goal of bringing about health in their lives.”

— Judah Smith, How's Your Soul?

Up until recently, senior photos have been just kinda of.... meh. I remember getting mine done in 2005 - our school forced us to go to one particular photography studio (how do I get THAT gig?!), and we could have the laser background (I KNOW you know what I'm talking about), or the textured grey. My photographer was particularly fancy and put a gel over his light, making it pink to match my shirt. If you were willing to be a candidate for further awkward torture, you got to change outfits, sit on plastic columns, prop your elbows up on other strange posing furniture, and try to look awesome in front of the airbrushed grapevines and stone bridges. I was even nice enough to include my old senior photo here for your amusement.

Even though I hated all the other poses and I thought the whole experience was tacky, it was a still a milestone. I have very clear memories of this day, and I'm especially glad that I do because it was my dad who took me to the studio. He wasn't much of a fuss-over-your-looks kind of person, but I remember him helping me carry my large cumbersome instrument up the narrow studio steps, and I remember the short, vague compliments he offered that really meant the world to me, especially now that he's gone. 

Your senior year is the last year you spend reveling in "life as you know it." It's when you will make amazing memories with your friends that you see everyday, because soon, you won't. It's likely the last time you will live at home - and if you're still living in your parents basement at 27, it will never quite be the same as it was when you were in high school! This year is so formative in who we will become. I often think that forcing an 18 year old to choose a career path isn't exactly fair. Sometimes I feel guilty for not using my English degree, but I didn't know what I wanted, nor had the formative experiences I needed, when I was 18.

Senior year is one of the last years, at least for a good long time, where everything still makes sense. Where you have a good idea of who you are, and how you fit into the world. Most times it's when you are in top physical shape, too. And if that in itself doesn't deserve a portrait session, what does?! Looking back on your senior photos should be a way to remember your interests, your passions, your style. That's why it's so important to me to capture the personality of my seniors, to take them to places special to them. It's "the glory days" for sure, and I just love making sure every sweet facet of it is remembered!

Dylan, who I had the pleasure of photographing last week, is headed to Penn State to study computer science. An avid nature lover, he requested that a part of his session take place in an incredible forest and beside a beautiful stream on property that his family owns. After capturing memories in a place where he has spent so much time fishing, camping, and building structures that would make any boy scout jealous, we got some more "fancy" photos around town. I just love how a totally different location can change the entire feel of the shoot! I hope you enjoy the may sides of Dylan in these highlights below!

INSTAGRAM CAN HELP YOU

When doing your research for who and where to take your senior photos, there is no doubt that the place people are hanging out online these days is Instagram. You may have heard that Facebook is "dead" and Twitter is just for famous people, but one thing is for certain, the social media world is ever changing, so it's good to be savvy with all of these  juggernauts and make them work in your favor! You may have never thought of Instagram as a search engine, but it definitely is! Just like Pinterest! The key is knowing how and what to search for on each platform! 

HIRE A PROFESSIONAL

Ever heard of hashtags? Of course you have, you don't live under a rock, I presume! Hashtags are an awesome way to search Instagram for anything you could want to see a picture of. Open the app, click that magnifying glass, and explore! If you want to be inundated with cuteness, search #puppies, if you want to find a gym type #yourcitygym, if you want to hire a photographer, type #yourcityphotographer. And you know what's great? When professionals are diligent and consistent with their hash tagging, this brings up a portfolio of sorts, so you can quickly peruse and find a vendor you like the style of right away. This really works, people. I was so honored that the beautiful Kayla, who's senior photos are featured here, found me on Instagram in this exact way! Instagram! I was hired through Instagram. (My mind is still blown!)

FIND A LOCAL SPOT

The other feature Instagram touts is the geo-tag! By adding a location to your post, people can tap on the location that's tagged above your photo and it opens up not only a map, but other photos tagged in that location! It's literally a way to discover a city through photos! And that's exactly how I found such cool and colorful places that fit both Kayla's style and my brand for her shoot. We had a starting point of Phipps Conservatory , heralded especially for its beautiful flowers and greenery. But I definitely wanted to switch it up from there and take advantage of Pittsburgh's urban vibe, and of course I'm a fanatic for color! By searching the neighborhood Phipps is located in, Oakland, on Instagram, we found an amazing bridge covered in locks that was walking distance from Phipps, and a killer mural on the side of a Mad Mex about 5 minutes away! I hope you enjoy Kayla's senior pics - the whole experience and opportunity was a match made in Instagram heaven!

Are you a bridesmaid? Do you have friends that are girls? Chances are, you will be in or involved in a wedding at some point in your life, and there's no better way to support your bestie than by being the most kick-butt bridesmaid or friend you can be on the wedding day. In this first ever guest blog post, the beautiful Mary Kuehn shares 10 lessons that bridesmaids can learn from her vast experience - 11 I do's and counting! Mary was a great sport as I drug her around town to capture all of these dresses, toting a literal box of them, changing in cars, venturing down locked stairwells, climbing on landscaping, twirling like a fool in view of band camp students... she's really quite amazing!

Without further ado.... here's Mary!

Hello!  No, I haven't gotten married eleven times--not even once, in fact!  I've just stood to the left with flowers in my hands a bunch of times while other people did.  I'm no Katherine Heigl, but hopefully I've learned something from these dresses, and I'm excited to get to share that with you.  As a bridesmaid, you are not the point, and there's a lot to do.  But, cheesy as it sounds, it also really is an honor to stand up and support your friend/relative/future in-law as she gets married, so make sure you enjoy it too!  The less stressed you are, the more you will enjoy it, so here are a few tips to make things a little easier.

P.S. One thing I didn't learn from being in weddings is how to wrap a sari, much as I loved wearing one!  My apologies to those of you that know what it really should look like and recognize that I can't dress myself.

Communicate

You, the bride, and the other bridesmaids are on the same team! Talk to them, and be nice to each other. If you're in different geographies, start an email thread or a group text and introduce yourselves.  You'll be glad!  You don't have to be BFFs with them all, but it will be so much more fun to collaborate if you know each other's names.  And who knows, maybe you'll even find a new friend.  The only reason I know the lovely Jill Stiffler is because we were both bridesmaids in a wedding last year, and now I can't imagine not knowing her!

More specifically, talk about duties and costs for the shower, bachelorette party, etc.  Costs add up quickly, and no one wants to be caught off guard having to suddenly pay for something they can't afford, so it helps to be sensitive to this and plan together.  Here's a spreadsheet template I used to keep shower costs organized and split them evenly, and the rest of the bridal party really appreciated it!  You can customize the formulas (don't worry, they're super simple!) with your bridesmaids' names and then just toss in anything anyone pays for.  You can also use an app like Splitwise to do the same sort of thing.

Plan Early

Your biggest job when it comes to planning will be putting together the bridal shower and bachelorette party, if the bride wants them.  The maid of honor is in charge, but she can't do it alone.  Start planning as soon as you can so you don't wind up rushing to throw things together, and don't be afraid to ask for help!  Find out what the bride would like since these parties are for her, after all, and don't forget to involve her mom in the shower if she wants that.  Moms always like to be thought of, even if they don't want to help with planning!

Another part of planning early is to start saving money for your dress, shoes, shower costs, hair appointment, etc.  Unfortunately, being in a wedding can be expensive, and that can be frustrating.  Even if you're doing things as cheaply as possible, you'll be glad if you set some money aside as soon as you know you'll be a bridesmaid.

Get Your Dress ASAP

Don't leave dresses until the last minute!  A lot of this depends on the bride deciding what she wants you to wear (and remember, that's ultimately up to her! don't be a dress bully), but the earlier you can get this worked out, the better.  Depending on where you get them, dresses can take several weeks or even months to come in, and you may need alterations.  Hopefully your friends have good taste like mine do, but even a hideous dress will look way better if it fits you properly.  

Don't Forget Your Feet

Break your shoes in a bit before the day of the wedding!  You'll feel (and look) so much more comfortable walking down the aisle if you've already walked around in your shoes.  Wear them to the rehearsal, so you'll know how they feel on the actual floor/grass/stone path you'll be walking on.  Besides, you'll spare yourself the horror of realizing as you're stepping into the aisle that your shoes are too big and literally flopping off your feet, when at that point there is nothing you can do but smile and desperately try not to trip.  Trust me and those gorgeous mint green peep toes on this one...seriously.  And bring some flats for the reception!

Make an Emergency Kit

This is for the day of the wedding.  I once had a dress split up the side just moments before I had to walk down the aisle!  No one noticed.  There are always a few little last minute fixes that someone in the bridal party needs, so it's helpful to bring a few things with you, such as:

• Makeup--even if you're getting it done by someone else, you usually have to bring your own foundation and mascara, plus anything you'll need for touchups at the last minute

• Tissues

• Bobby pins

• Safety pins, and maybe even a sewing kit

• Hairspray

• Deodorant

• Dental floss, mouthwash

• A razor--why does someone always forget to shave their pits?!

• Clear tape--for sudden dress or shoe emergencies

• Steamer--not as crucial, but slightly miraculous if anyone's dress is wrinkled

• A non-messy snack--see below

Be a Problem Solver

This is always a good thing to be, but I'm specifically referring to the morning of the wedding.  Remember, you're part of the bride's team.  Make her day less stressful, and protect her sanity in any way you can.  If people are peppering her with questions you can answer, answer them.  If someone wants her to solve a problem you can take care of, solve it.  Just do what needs to be done.  She has plenty to think about, and part of your job is to make hers easier so she can fully enjoy her wedding day!  

Know What's Expected

Pitch in, stay afterward, and help clean up.  The bride and groom's families will be SO grateful for this.  Bring a change of shoes, or even a full change of clothes if you want, so that this is easier.  Random last minute things will come up in the few days leading up to the wedding, so be prepared to help the bride out with whatever she needs (both practical needs and emotional support) that week.  Again, just do what needs to be done, and when everyone does that, things go pretty fast!  This day is not about you, and remembering that will make you so much happier about serving your friends and helping out.  

Don't Get Hangry

It took me a few weddings to remember this one.  While the guests are snacking on appetizers before the reception, you will be taking lots of pictures.  Breakfast, if you even ate it, was a while ago by now.  You will definitely get hungry.  Anyone who thinks to bring snacks (or commissions a guest to bring them a tray of appetizers) will be a bridal party hero!  Also, make sure the bride eats at least a little bit on her wedding day.  She will forget, and even if she remembers, she'll find she's too busy and has too many people to talk to.  Be a dear and just bring her some food.

Have Grace for Yourself

Things will go wrong.  It's okay.  They will probably be tiny things that no one will notice, but even if they're not, just look for where you can help, and do what needs to be done.  As long as the bride and groom wind up married to each other, it's been a successful day!  This leads us into:

Remember the Why

Even though yeah, we already know this and it sounds trite, it's way too easy to lose sight of the most important thing of all when the details are overwhelming.  Remember the reason you are here, and help the bride remember it too. You love the bride and groom, they love each other, and they are about to commit their lives to one another.  Wow!  At the heart of all this, your most important job is not to avert disaster, plan a shower, look pretty, or smooth the train of a dress. You're here to support two friends in their marriage, not just in the details of their wedding day.  Marriage is a big deal!  It is exciting and serious and life-changing!  The bride and groom are building a life together, not just planning a party, and if you or they forget that, none of the wedding details matter.  

Stop for a minute and let that really sink in!  Their marriage matters the most.  Remind the bride of this when she gets overwhelmed, too.  Pray for them, for their relationship and their marriage, and let the little planning details fall into perspective.  Make sure you remember it again when the ceremony is about to begin.  Give her one last hug as a single lady, smile down the aisle, enjoy your front row view of their vows, and have fun celebrating your friends!